Questions And Exercises: Chapter V. Connection, The Soul Of Good Writing
§21. In each of the following the single-sentence paragraphs are badly arranged. Discover the best order and number the sentences. Then write out each group of sentences as one paragraph. The first paragraph will have four sentences; the second, seven; the third, twelve.
1. There is no waste to this circulation.
People who know how to create a real living room, to enjoy it, and to make their friends enjoy it are the kind of people for whom this magazine is published.
Nowhere does native refinement display itself more than in the appointments of this room and its atmosphere of good cheer.
The living room is the heart of the home.
2. We plan, write and illustrate printed things so that they are always attractive and successful, regardless of the low price.
A piece of printing can be fine without being high-priced.
If the message is important enough, the messenger's clothes are not criticised.
"The Philistine" isn't what a printer would call a "fine" printing job, but you' grab for it the moment it comes in.
All of the Ethridge printed work is "fine" because the first thing we put into it is the idea.
It isn't paper or presswork or ink that makes a piece of printing valuable.
If the "Message to Garcia" had been printed on hickory bark or strawboard or wrapping paper it would still have caused everyone who saw it to read it and say: "Good! bully! great! fine!"
3. There are two kinds of copy: Good copy and bad copy.
The advertiser pays the newspaper for the amount of space he uses.
The value of space to the advertiser is determined by the kind of copy he puts in it
What he pays represents the value of the space to the newspaper publisher.
It does not represent the value of the space to the advertiser.
Good copy is copy that is good enough to sell goods day after day at a profit over its cost.
This accomplished, he then prints words in it.
Before a man can advertise he must buy space.
If it can't do that, it is as good as a man who can talk but cant sell.
Is your copy, tested by this standard, earning its keep?
There is an easy way to tell good copy from bad.
These words, in advertising parlance, are termed "copy." $ 22. 1. Write two or three paragraphs between which you secure close connection by the methods described in this section - either echo words, demonstratives, or numerals.
2. Explain wherein the connection between the following paragraphs is faulty:
A man who bought some collection form-letters was much pleased. He wrote as much to the firm that sold them. Then he asked this question: "By using them by the dozen, what will your very first price be to us?" This question, considered as English, has a grave fault I will explain this fault.
"By using them" ought to read "if we use them". It would be much clearer, and the sentence would sound better every way.
§ 23. Write a theme from the outline which you prepared under section thirteen. Pay particular attention to the opening sentence of each paragraph, so as to insure smooth transition from the preceding paragraph.
§ 24. 1. On studying the following paragraph, you will perceive that another sentence is needed at the point indicated by a caret. It is needed to complete the logical connection among the first sentences, and to prepare the way for the last sentence. Construct such a sentence.
At the foundation of this business is the idea of good service for everybody. Perhaps nine stores out of ten are organized with the idea of supplying the person of average wants with average merchandise. Lauerman's is the tenth store. A Another important reason why shopping by mail here is in your favor - when you send us your order, whether large or small, it is given special attention by one who is detailed especially for that purpose, and who goes to each department and shops for you just as well as if you were here yourself.
2. The following paragraph contains an abrupt comparison. Consider carefully whether there should not be a few words of transition (or a sentence) at the point indicated by the caret. Try to construct such a phrase or sentence.
In those days, the Bell Company had small credit. Once, when the treasurer ordered a small bill of goods from a merchant named Tillotson, of 15 Dey street, New York, the merchant replied that the goods were ready, and so was the bill which was seven dollars. A The magnificent building of the New York Telephone Company stands today on the site of Tillotson's store.
§ 25. 1. Note the awkward use of adversatives (But - But), and suggest an improvement.
We have selected your journal as the one in which we will place our advertisement for Export Trade at an early date. But at the present time, owing to dull business and poor collections in the States, we do not feel that we can afford to assume any additional liabilities by signing a contract with you now. But as soon as business and collections become better you will certainly hear from us.
2. Write a paragraph in which the idea of so occurs many times. But instead of beginning the sentences with So, begin them with more dignified expressions meaning the same thing.
3. Show how the connection between these two sentences can be improved by changing the order of words in the second:
The advertisement carried by us has been somewhat out of the ordinary, but it would have been of no value if we had not succeeded in getting it read and absorbed. I have nothing to say in short except that we are thoroughly satisfied with the results even at the large expense which we are incurring.
4. Write a paragraph of several sentences in which the beginning of each sentence echoes some word of the preceding, and the order of words in the sentence is varied as in the paragraph about shoes.
5. From the following paragraphs certain ligament words have been removed. These words were for example, but, accordingly, therefore, and, consequently, certainly, then, moreover. Study the paragraphs and place each of the nine ex-pressions in its proper place. The carets indicate where words were taken out. Report the given word and that following, thus: then comparatively; accordingly attracted, etc.
There was a time when anything we saw in print seemed very serious and deliberate. It had an extraordinary adventitious dignity, and we attached to it a corresponding weight and significance. Journals were A comparatively few in number. The utterances of their editors and contributors A attracted a great deal of attention, and there was much more time than there is now to give them a deliberate and serious reading. A in our time there has been an unmistakable falling off in the influence of printed opinion. The power of the editorial is A not what it once was.
The telegraph and the telephone, A have drawn the world together into something like a single community. It is just as easy and natural to read the news of yesterday from Rome as the news of yesterday from the neighboring town ^ with the news comes the comment, comment from every quarter, not only from our neighbors but from editors and correspondents all over the world A what we read begins to have for us only the significance of what we hear. Printed opinions are coming to take their rank with casually spoken opinions, and editorial comment has very little more weight than conversational comment.
A very interesting thing has happened ^ involving an entirely new assessment of what we read. We are beginning to judge what we read as we judge what we hear, by the character of the person who utters it. It is becoming a matter of common knowledge who can own certain journals ^ that the opinions of those journals are the opinions of the owners, that they may not be at all the individual opinions of the editor who penned them.